You could try a traditional barn paint, such as milk paint. I've used Original Milk Paint before and it looks great! Not sure if can be used on an exterior, but it will certainly give you that color!

I would suggest you take out the cabinet that is to the right of the stove and use it elsewhere in the house -- perhaps in the bathroom or dining room with a hutch above it. Then, I would suggest you have someone install a lazy susan cabinet in the corner between the sink counter and the stove, meaning you would move the stove down a bit and have a small cabinet/counter top to the right of the stove. I would suggest you have the cabinets refinished in white and then paint the walls a pastel you like. If you would prefer white walls, then add white-painted crown molding and paint the ceiling a light neutral blue, such as Sherwin Williams Niagara Falls Blue. Then, I would suggest you choose a favorite accent color and use this sparingly in accessories like towels, pot holders, small vases or floral arrangements, and a valence above the triple windows. For a genuine 1940s look, you might have white ceramic square tiles with a rectangular red border installed as a back splash behind and above the stove. If you are replacing counter tops, I would suggest a light color such as white with a beige or light grey vein or striation for some sort of pattern. You might be able to find the same color and design in floor tile OR opt for a wood floor as another poster suggested.

I like @kelly's idea of picking a lovely fresh color of paint for the door. You can then bring it down onto the stair risers. Either a solid color to match the front door, or go wild and add some decorative elements to the risers with stencils. Or think of staining the door a great color and coordinate the stair railings and risers. I have an idea book put together for just such project that might spark some ideas for you. http://www.houzz.com/ideabooks/16700983/thumbs/Kathryn-Delany-s-Decorative-Stair-Risers

My vote is for the wash but not in bright white and after some selective knot primer in the same tone. You are going to want to selectively primer down about 2/3 of the knots (use a dark white tinted primer), and use a dark white / brown toned off white instead of bright white so the beams still give you dark white on bright - that would be my vote. Consider something like bm stingray tinted primer and wash on the beams. You can add glaze for more working time or put down dropcloths and use water to cut it into a wash. Test it on some other raw wood that has had tannins develop for a few years. Then put it against your white wall - your husband will get the contrast and wood grain but you'll get the quiet palette you were hoping for. They both will have architectural depth and interest.