The all black kitchen looks scary as. Maybe because there's no lightness in there at all.

You are so right white is never out of fashion. I would set your budget and then look at your options. If you plan to stay in the house for many years then spend to the top of your budget (if that is going to give you a life time of pleasure), if you plan on being at the home for only a short time / few years then I would go mid range so it looks lovely, will have good resale value but you can invest your well earned money to go towards something else as well. Obviously Marble / Granite is the top of the range but there are so many cheaper and very attractive options these days that look just as good.

What about colour , character and personality ? A splashback with a pond and a tree may be great , or look naff , as the Poms would say . Potentially , its on the right track , but look at pic 3 . Gone to sleep yet ? Probably $30k spent on nothingness . Now look at pic 3 , and imagine your splashback . Even if it is ( cringe ) black and white too , it will actually add to it . A bit . I don't like the particular light used in pic 1 , but its got character , you notice it , it is not totally bland . Pic 3 is .

I would like to keep the beautiful knotty pine ceilings and soffit, and cabinets (but paint a different color). I will be updating the floor and counter tops. My real dilemma is the wall - it's a ceramic tile that looks like brick and the color is so bland. I would like to brighten that up with paint but am having trouble deciding on the color combo of the cabinets and walls. The kitchen is open to a living area that is decorated mainly in sage green and cream.